“I’m wild womaning! GIVE ME A FUCKING BREAK” I scream at the man in my life, a term I have become well accustomed to using since learning about the magical cycles of the women’s body. As though that excuses me from being a horrible, bossy, nitpicky and critical……..for lack of a better and more appropriate word……BITCH.
If you are not in the loop, the wild woman phase of a women’s cycle (her menstrual cycle that is) is the phase which mainstream, scientifically minded peps would call pre-menstrual. The phase in which the wild can most definitely be unleashed, combined with our general every day life stresses, irritations, inner blocks, self love issues, body aches and pains and the rest can sometimes develop into non the less but the phase of the bitch.
Now this may come across as offensive to some but lets get real shall we, we can ALL have moments of bitchy, (boys included don’t think you don’t suffer this bitch phase because you don’t bleed, I see you) weather we can suppress it, or control it is another story and for some, the bitchy fire roars stronger than in others, but overall, we are all cyclic beings weather we move in the cycle of the woman or the cycle of life, and it is important to acknowledge the shadow as well as the light.
Below are my 5 go to tips for working with your inner BITCH how to honor her (or him), face her, work through her and with her to help life, love, sex, communication and relationships flow just a tinsy bit easier.
1. OWN IT MOTHER F**KER – The first tip I want to discuss is the importance of owning the fact that you are a wee bit bitchy. No one likes someone who can’t own or face their own shit and yes I get it, it sucks to admit that you are being an asshole but owning your bitchy ways is the first step to navigating through it. Ignoring, passing the blame, denial and excuse making can and will only elongate any argument or hurts caused from your bitchy vibe. While owning it is only part of the process in healing from any bitch fit outburst it is a CRUCIAL step that can not be missed.
2. GET TO KNOW YOURSELF – Now no, meditation, yoga, mindfulness etc may not for be everyone but the more mindfulness of your own invention that you can practice the more you can recognize these bitchy moments approaching. Become the watcher of your thoughts and catch those angry vibes approaching and begin to notice what your body, mind and soul needs before you hit breaking point. This will help when it comes to knowing it is time to nurture your sweet, angelic bitchy self and to explain to your lovers, sexy friends and soul people what you need bringing us to…………….
3. EXPLAIN WHAT YOU NEED – When we are in a bitchy rampage it is so easy to get caught up in the moment and lose it in a spazo meltdown, Brides Maids style chocolate fountain and all (omg fave meltdown evs am I right?!). Have you ever thought it may make life a LITTLE bit easier if you explain to the loving humans surrounding you (especially your sexy friend/lover) that you are feeling bitchy so please be gentle with me today, let me sulk if I need to sulk and give me some fucking breathing space okay. At least warn your poor lovers that you may lose the plot at any given moment and to tred carefully. I would also recommended if you are woman to educate your man/partner about the menstrual cycle system I speak of regularly and to educate yourself on how our monthly cycle can be beautiful simply because it teaches us how and why we can at some moments feel fricken amazing, and others can feel bitchy and horrid af. By explaining how your feeling, and what you need to feel you can support your sweet soul through this bitchy period it can make this period of time flow much easier.
4. BE AWARE SEXY – So yes, our wild woman phase can be when we are ready to fuck verses make love, but it is also the phase in which we can be bossy as FUCK in the bedroom and anything and everything can irritate us, which can sometimes result in bruising, hurt and sexy walls going up for our partners who may end up feeling inadequate and uncappable of satisfying. While it is so important to communicate what we enjoy and ask for what we want, when sexing it up with another it is equally important to have compassion for our partner as well. It can be very confusing for our partner when one moment we LOVE our nipple being bitten, our neck being kissed, doggy style or hair pulled and the next we are slapping their hand away and accuse them of degrading us, or begin to huff in puff in irritation at the fact they just can not find our sweet spot (most probably because our bitchy hormones can’t even navigate where our sweet spot is in that moment). While bitchy sex can be an amazing outlet, calming, loving and magical just be aware of your lovers feelings because no one needs to be over criticized and belittled simply because we cant figure out wtf we want. It is a sure way to sabotage you and your partner in the bedroom by leaving no room for sexy creative experimentation and flow.
A tool I use in these sexy moments of frustration:
Whilst your partner is kissing you, your tummy, body, pussy, neck whatevs take a deep breath drawing awareness from the top of your head right down into the depths of your yoni.
As you breathe in invision, think of, speak (internally or outwardly) the word “Love”, “Light”, “Sexy”, “Confidence” etc whatever you feel you need in that moment and continue this for a couple of breaths to help you re-center within your body. Works a treat every time 😉
5.CREATE A SACRED BITCHY PRACTICE – What may feel sacred, spiritual and divine to me will be totatlly different to you but these are some of the sacred practices I pull out when I’m feeling bitchy and don’t know how the feck to get out of it.
Dance that shit out, no mirrors, no clothes, no other people, just me myself and I, my headphones, my music, crazy, spaztic, violent, sexual dance moves and the sweet divine.
Exercise, but exercise that feels GOOD to you. Pushing yourself doing exercises that make you feel self critical and forces you to push, push, push in this phase is not ideal
for everyone so listen to your soul and do what feels GOOD.
Sexy self love, self explanatory, love your sweet self girl 😉
Meditation, when in these moments a guided meditation works best for me but sometimes silence can be golden.
Earth yo self, bare feet, out in nature, fresh air, can and will work miracles.
And my final tip of the day is RETREAT if you can, if it comes down to it and the bitchy gets to much I give you 100% permission to retreat and give yourself some breathing space lovely.
Remember we can all get bitchy, you are not a shit human, but you are human so honor yourself.
The light, the beautiful and the bitchy.
Lots of love
Amy Dee xxo